Like the Corners of My Mind
The other night I had dinner with a friend and we were sitting near a group of people who were discussing bad prom dates. One of the guys in the group made a comment about the girl he had taken to the prom and wondered what she was doing now. Another guy said, “I don’t really care, my prom date was a total loser, she had to be home by midnight.”
I listened to them for awhile, and my friend and I laughed a little because it caused us to remember our own disastrous prom dates. Yet, as I was laughing, I began to get paranoid. I wondered if I was also a bad prom date and somewhere, the guy I went to the prom with had done the same thing these guys were doing. I looked up at my girlfriend, and in a panic, I said “Maybe we’re all bad prom dates.”
Sometimes I’m struck by the bonds that tie us together, and other times, but the fact that no bonds are possible. Do we form fewer bonds as we get older? I found out recently that a childhood friend’s mother had died and went to the visitation at the funeral home last night. I saw her standing in the doorway and we hugged and chatted like no time had passed, when it has probably been at least 10 years since I’ve seen her, talked to her or had any information about her at all. We began talking about growing up together, how her dad used to drive us to the local movie theater and drop us off and the funny sayings her mother always had when I would spend the night at her house. It was as if time had stood still. I felt sad that we had lost touch and our lives had taken different paths and I remembered what good friends we had been in our childhood.
What is it about growing up with someone or graduating from high school with a person that causes that bond to remain strong? It seems like it is more than just living in the same town or attending the same school. It’s nice to look back and talk about those memories but it seems like there’s a deeper connection, one that I cannot explain.
As I think about my son growing up, and the friends he has had through his school years already, I wonder if these kinds of bonds still exist. Maybe the bonds are there but no one ever realizes they exist until 20 years later when you run into a person from your past or you attend the funeral of a classmate that brings you all together.
April 26th, 2008 at 3:38 pm
Hi Trish,
Oh my, Kyle is turning into such a fine looking young mad. Getting so grown up.
There is something very special about old friends. It seems like no matter how much time goes by, you never have to “explain” anything, you just know things. It’s almost like a sibling that way. You just seem to “jump in” right where you left off.
I really enjoy making new friends but there’s nothing like an old one. I remember a song we used to sing in Girl Scouts:
Make new friends but keep the old,
One is silver and the other’s gold.
I hope things are well with you.
Joy
http://joyerickson.wordpress.com/