M is for Mourning
Sunday night I watched the ABC show, Brothers and Sisters, and it broke my heart. One of the characters on the show is getting a divorce, and her husband has decided to ask for full custody of their children. Once I saw this story being introduced into the show, I almost turned it off. But I kept watching. What I saw made me want to stop right then and write a thank you note to ABC for the way that story was handled. Here was a mother, who really had not done anything wrong. She was not being sued for custody because she was a bad mother, or an unfit parent. What this show portrayed was a mother who loved her children, who had done the best she could, had worked full-time while her children were growing up, and now found herself facing a divorce and starting a new life. Her soon to be ex-husband decided that the children belonged with him and he won. I am sure to anyone else watching it was sad, but not gut wrenching the way it was to me.
She had to say goodbye to her children and help them pack to go and live with their father. This mother, who was a good mother, who loved her children and always put them first, had to smile and pretend to be happy, telling them how much fun they would have and what a great adventure was happening to them. She hugged them goodbye, told them she loved them and would see them soon, and then watched them walk out the door with their father.
As the door shut, she collapsed to the floor and cried.
I felt her pain, and I cried along with her, even though she was a television character. I sat there sobbing uncontrollably, reliving the pain of the day I had to pack up my own son’s belongings, paste a smile on my face and tell him goodbye.
After my meltdown, I thought about the episode and as I mentioned before, I was pleased at how this topic had been handled. I wanted to write about my own experience and what I went through and how I felt, but it seems like every time I try to put into words the pain I felt (and still feel) when I went through what I did, I feel my brain freeze, my fingers unable to type, and my breathing increases. I feel another panic attack coming on and I have to divert my attention to something else less painful, like drilling a hole in my finger with a power tool.
So, as I try to find a way to wrap up this post, I really have none. I don’t have a point to this post except that it was a good episode and handled a very sensitive and painful topic in a very mature and classy manner. Good for you, ABC, you can do something right occasionally.
October 31st, 2007 at 9:45 am
Happy Halloween.
November 1st, 2007 at 4:04 pm
In life there are things for which there are few sources of comfort, sometimes just knowing that someone else knows something exists or happens is a solace of sorts. Sorry for your pain, but am gladdened that it might have helped you heal in some way.
November 1st, 2007 at 8:03 pm
Every once in a rare purple moon the networks do a story with some truth, and some heart.